Casual Dating advisor - part 7

The fling alibi

This section talks about how you can make sure that hard facts that could expose your fling do not arise in the first place, or at least remain hidden.

Look out for marks on your body!

There is nothing more revealing than lipstick marks, scratches on your back, perfume, hairs and unwashed hands ("There are two things in the world that smell like fish. And one of them is fish..."). Take great care to clean and generally look after your body after your new erotic experience!

Don't go out in public together!

In the case of celebrities, any public flirting is soon splashed all over the press.

Although you are probably not being followed by paparazzi you still have to be careful. Avoid your regular hangouts. Don't walk around arm in arm in your local shopping arcade. You may well bump into a friend of your regular partner.

Find a suitable place for your fling!

Where will your little tête-à-tête take place? Let's go through the various options:

  • At his or her place?
    No, that's taboo. Think about stains, your partner coming back unexpectedly etc., etc.
  • Borrowing your friend's flat
    Sounds convenient, but don't do it! Confidants are a very bad idea if you want to be a professional flinger. Please see the next paragraph!
  • In a hotel
    When it comes to keeping the fling a secret, this is great, but somewhat expensive in the long run (For low-price hotels, look up the ETAP or MotelOne chains, just type them into Google!). But it's unfortunately it's a little impersonal.
  • In the countryside
    Find a well-secluded place! And always remember to freshen up afterwards, or there'll be trouble!
  • In the swinger club
    This may sound a bit odd, but it's really quite handy if you think about it. First of all, you can go off to a separate room, and secondly, they're often free for couples and there is free food and drink and all the extra excitement is included too...
No confidants!

You have told your best friend? Or your mate is your alibi because you covered up for him a little while ago? Or you show off a little when you've had a few; you're all mates after all. What could possibly go wrong ...

...that's what you think (your poor naïve thing;-). And what happens when one day this great friendship is no more. Then he has something over you. Or your mate's wife gets a divorce. He blames you and runs amok.

Therefore: keep your mouth shut. Somebody will eventually say something!

Stay in control!

You have to stay in control! You decide when to make calls! You decide, where to meet. Only then can you protect yourself from nasty surprises.

Don't forget the details!

Here are a few little tips and tricks to make sure nobody gets suspicious:
  • Don't save your fling's number under their real name. Innocuous looking descriptions such as: "AA", "D1-Service", "foreign mailbox"
  • Under no circumstances must you make fling arrangements from your PC which your partner has access to. It is always better to visit an Internet cafe.
  • Be good and observe traffic regulations! Or you, and possibly even your fling, could be caught on speed camera or you get a parking ticket somewhere you should never have been in the first place!
  • Any fling paraphernalia can be stored under the spare wheel in the boot. At least for a while.

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