Casual Dating advisor - part 2

The first meeting

Excellent, that's the first step: you have agreed to meet for a real date. What should I bear in mind? We'll tell you:

Always meet in a neutral place!

For a first meeting, a neutral place is most suitable because it is easier to leave without too much embarrassment if you don't like each other. What's more, you don't encroach on anyone's privacy, as would be the case if you met a new person in your own home, for example.

The classic neutral places are restaurants and bars. An even more relaxed atmosphere can be achieved if you meet up for an activity such as mini golf or kite flying ;-) Also very popular among flingers: hotel bars. It's less public there and of course, rooms are not far away...

Dress up!

We don't even need to mention that personal hygiene is extremely important. If you've had a shower and have clean fingernails you don't just make a better impression, you will also feel much better. And choose your outfit to match the location.

Don't be afraid!

It is exciting to meet a potential fling that you met online for the first time. You will have a thousand different thoughts going through your mind. But you really shouldn't worry, because:

  • Nobody is taking the piss! Your fling is as interested in the meeting as you are. He or she has invested a lot of time and effort before a real meeting takes place. It's rather unlikely, therefore, that you will be stood up.
  • Your date will feel just as nervous at first. A simple solution: think of a few topics of conversation based on what you talked about before.
  • Another way of calming your nerves and creating a relaxed atmosphere is to approach the topic directly.
You can do anything, you have to do nothing!

This is particularly important for women: once you have come as far as meeting your fling for the first time in real life, you don't have to do anything you don't want to do. And don't feel obliged to do anything. You didn't sign a contract.

If you don't like the person, just go home. And give your honest opinion. Polite phrases like "I'll call you!" or "See you next time!" will often be misunderstood, creates false hopes and you may end up with an irritating admirer.

Don't rush anything!

You probably know this from experience: you pull someone just when your house is really messy. And next time you tidy up before you go out and nothing happens.

What are we saying? Don't plan too much and don't rush anything. You don't have to book a hotel room for your first meeting. This would just put yourself and your fling partner under unnecessary pressure.

Be relaxed - always bear in mind that "you can do anything, you have to do nothing". Be casual and check each other out slowly. If you had met somewhere else, you would also would also first pass through the various flirting stages.

Men: remember safe sex! Don't play Russian roulette!

Your first meeting went excellently and the fling is slowly but surely reaching its climax. You fumble around a bit and the whole thing fails because you have no protection...

Dear male fling candidates: take some responsibility. Whatever it is you talked about regarding contraception. You should always have a condom ready! Not least to protect yourself.

Continue with:      advisor part 3: How to cover up a fling

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